Define the Relationship to Prevent Your Break Up

Many couples may not realize that they need to define their relationship. This means that you need to discuss each others views on what you expect out of the relationship. It may sound too academic but it is a fact that one of the biggest reasons relationships have problems and break ups occur is because each partner has different expectations and assumptions of what will happen in their relationship or what kind of relationship they are actually in. Defining your relationship will give you a much better perspective.
Without defining your relationship you may be asking for hurt emotions and a very rocky future, if not a break up. If you feel you are heading toward marriage and you are looking forward to that family life with your boyfriend or girlfriend and kids, but they are thinking they are in a romantic fling and don't want anything more, then you will most likely have problems, unless you communicate better.
Part of the problem is that most people feel that the way they think must be normal. Only, there really is no normalcy in the way people think. Just like a fingerprint is unique, we are all unique in our needs, feelings, fears and desires. This is why defining a relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend is critical. You need to understand each others strengths and weaknesses better, as well as general desires.
You may not even know it but you most likely use your own behavior and thoughts as a baseline for others. This manifests itself as us assuming we know what other's desires, needs or wants are. At some conscience level you probably do realize that you don't know what your partner really wants but it is hard to express that and put it into some kind of action.
Also, many people will sit back and not take any action if everything seems to be ok. Men especially do this. If everything seems happy and conflicts are being avoided, there seems to be no reason to examine or evaluate a relationship. We tend to only examine the relationship when things finally go wrong. This is why you need to define your relationship before a break up occurs. Your partner may seem happy and you may be happy, but for different reasons. You may be setting yourself up for a break up.
When you take time to define your relationship you will have a much clearer picture of where you are heading. Eventually you will have a stronger relationship and both be heading in a common direction rather than going on two separate paths without even knowing it. The strain of heading down two separate emotional paths is a good way to cause a break up in your future.
Defining a relationship is not a comfortable task. Thus, many people avoid it. To get the conversation started can be very awkward and stressful. In addition you may have an element of fear that you and your girlfriend or boyfriend will end up realizing that you have completely different goals and you should break up.
Believe it or not, these are usually worries that never amount to anything. A good discussion about your goals and desires and your partner's goals and desires results in a much stronger bond and more understanding. There is always the slim chance that someone may get emotionally hurt in the discussions, but usually this is not the case. It is well worth the effort to define your relationship and get emotionally closer to your partner in order to prevent a break up.

Mark Jordan